a click for my thoughts

Kung sino man ang matamaan, siguraduhin nyo lang….dahil ‘di ko sasabihin. Kung sino ka mang nakakasiguro, ‘wag mo sanang masamain. Ako lamang ay naghahayag ng saloobin nang maibsan ang damdamin.

I miss you. It’s been a while since the last time. It seems my memory of you is being questioned, being replaced with something I cannot fully fathom.

We used to have fun. We used to see each other regularly; and tho’ I totally understand why it can’t be like it was before, and neither am I expecting nor demanding, I just want to say: I miss it. I miss you.

I used to get excited upon knowing we’ll see each other, but now it seems the pleasant feeling is or will be accompanied by awkwardness. I used to be able to hug you tight at will, but now I longed for those moments when I can do so with true feelings of closeness. I miss it and the times when I can rest my arms on your shoulders or lean on you. I miss being able to share with you and laugh with you. I miss us being silly. I miss us being funny. I miss learning from you and admiring your wisdom. I miss you.

I used to know for sure you are proud of me and that you beamingly refer to me with esteem. But now, I want to know if you still do and have always been. I appreciate the times you were a witness to my accomplishments, and I’d love it if you are a witness still. I’d be content just to know you’d be rejoicing with me.

I used to talk to you with ease and sheer transparency, and be my truest self around you. But now, I feel I can’t let my guard down in fear of what you’ll think of me.

And tho’ we had never been always together, I sure do miss having you around and the idea that you’ll be around on those usual moments.

Perhaps one day I’d be able to express myself freely and directly, and I am sorry that I presently couldn’t. But for now, let me say it this way. I miss you.

081107

~ by klengsfile on August 18, 2007.